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Howdy!  My name is Marcie and I am a survivor.  What is a survivor?  Well, that could mean a lot of things.  In my case, I am a survivor of abuse.  I survived a variety of abuse throughout my life, but I finally took a good look in the mirror and asked myself “Do you want to spend the next 40 years of your life the same way you spent the first 40?”  That answer was a big fat “NO!”  After years of feeling not good enough, not pretty enough, not smart enough…I started to like who I saw looking back at me in that mirror.  I have children that needed a better role model.  I was going to be strong for them and show them a better happier life and teach them that we all deserve more out of life.  It wasn’t easy.  Holy cow it was more than tough at times. There were moments that I fell back into that negative way of thinking, but through it all I kept my head up and I pushed through.  I realized that because of others I had begun to make myself believe that I wasn’t good enough.  It was my own voice in my head telling me I wasn’t good enough or smart enough or pretty enough.  For years I was whispering that to myself over and over and over again without even realizing.

So here’s a thought…if I could make myself believe I wasn’t good enough, I could surely make myself believe I was good enough.  So I did!  After a while I started seeing for myself all those great qualities that my friends and family had been telling me I had for years.  Again…it wasn’t easy.  It took time and lots of practice ( I still have to practice), but I got there and you can too!  Now I am 42, live in one of the most beautiful parts of the US, have a very fulfilling job, a wonderful supportive family and some great friends, but most of all I have happiness and peace.

Ok so now you say “so what…what makes you an expert on abuse?”  I am no expert, I don’t have a counseling degree, I’m not a therapist…but I am a survivor.  Been there, done that.  I don’t proclaim to have all the answers or to have gone through what you have, but I do know what it feels like to be beat down mentally and physically…to be told you are worthless…to feel like there is no reason to live and I am still surviving, I am happier than I ever thought possible and I want to help others feel better about themselves.  I now work with victims everyday in my job and I believe God put me on this planet to share and help others.  So if you are struggling with abuse of any kind, please feel free to join this blog and listen, share, ask questions, use it however you need.  There is no judgment from me…we are all equals in my book.  I hope you  can see that you are beautiful, you are special, and you are worth so much.

Take care!

M

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